The event horizon has been delayed.

I am sorry to inform all of you, the event horizon has been delayed for approximately 2 weeks while a defective light is being replaced. You may ask, how did anyone know the light beyond the event horizon had gone out? Many more however will ask, what's the event horizon? I'll get back to that later.

I took a quiz about depression and I failed. There are at least 6 people more depressed and crazy than I am. At this point, I think I would fail a urine test.

I changed the blog colors. Why? Just because I could.

OK, back to the event horizon thing. The event horizon can be defined as a boundary in spacetime, from beyond which nothing can be observed. In general relativity space and time are completely intertwined. Bend space you bend time. Bend time and you bend space. Therein, you can travel anywhere instantly if you can bend space without breaking it. Given a pair of wire cutters and a clue about the programmers family I could hack the password and break both. (Sidenote: The perfect T-shirt for me)

We start with the black hole. No, not her. A black hole is thought to be a thing (technical term) with absolute definition and such mass (and subsequently gravity) that nothing can escape it's grasp. This would include light and stuff defined as "anything".

Since that which we see is a function of things, or in the case of seeing them, light, we can not see anything beyond this boundary. The bigger the black hole, the greater the grasp and the less we will see.

So, if THE CAT is beyond the event horizon, even if we attempted to see what the cat was doing we couldn't. Does that mean we wouldn't influence the outcome? (Schrodie's Cat T-Shirt)

Nevermind.

The thing (different but still technical term) that gets me, is what the hell happens to all that stuff. Take our favorite scalar physical quantity known as energy. According to the law of conservation of energy Energy can not be created or destroyed. Its a LAW and it's on the interweb so:

1. must be true
2. don't screw with it.

So, nothing can be destroyed and nothing can escape the hole. So what exactly is going on in there?

Entropy (Another LAW) basically states that all things are moving from a state of order to disorder. (Wait, how does evolution work then???) Yet, you have a collection of energy which cannot escape the event horizon. Stupid Chaos Theory.

What is going on in there is very similar to a small child losing their intestines to a swimming pool cleaning system. (Sadly, the poor girl has died.)

None the less, where does it go? Damn it!!!!!! Its annoying me. I can't get over this. Are you with me? You can't destroy or create energy. (Everything is energy.) It goes beyond the horizon and disappears forever. But everything is going from order to disorder.

Right at the heart of this is the gravitational or spacetime singularity. You can only measure this in infinite terms. Holy crap. Infinity? Wait, what happens if I bust past the event horizon at infinite speed?

Better yet, according to General Relativity (actual NASA link) the Big Bang occurred at one, single, finite, specific, uno, point. Yet a singularity occurs within all these black holes. Okay, you're right, these are curvature singularities.

Actually, singularities are commonly separated as conical and curvature singularities. The differences is whether or not they have an event horizon.

I'm guessing there some serious wackiness going on. I suspect the oil companies are involved too.

Did I mention I'M SINGLE?

Back to the Cat.

Schrodengers cat has so many good uses. 1)Homework 2)Prompt arrival for work or dinner 3) Every fight you have ever had with a spouse.

OK, you all want to know about this cat. The cat is dead and not dead. The outcome of any future scenario is unknown. The only way to know the outcome is post facto. If you observe the incident you influence the outcome. (The cat was and was not and is and is not long before refrigerators had lights.) So ultimately everything in the future exists with all possible outcomes. The part people don't like is when there is a bad outcome. You only know the outcome because you observed it. Ergo, it's your fault for looking.

1) Yes I did my homework unless you asked me for it. Therefor, I don't have it because you wanted it.

2) I was both early and late for this important engagement. I was on time until you asked.

3) Yes Dear. I did say that, but you can't be mad because you wouldn't have been mad if you hadn't asked me. I rightly may have had a completely different answer had you not asked.

It's everyone else's fault. Except the cat. But since you read this YOU made it the cats fault. Or not.

Something to do.

I need something to do. I'm as bored as a Priest at a Girls' Choir practice.

It's not that I don't have things I should be doing. I don't want to to do those because they're not fun. So, I guess more specifically, I need something fun to do. The problem is there is a direct correlation between fun and incarceration. The better the ideas I have and more fun things tend to be for me, the longer the minimum mandatory sentencing guidelines are.

It's not that I'm trying to harm anyone or anything. It's just a distinct lack of any semblance of a sense of humor on the part of the government. Albeit true, I work for said government carefully dispensing anti-fun. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate the art.

To take a completely unrelated example, I present to you Murray Head.

Murray Head you ask? Yes, and stop giggling you ninny. You will recall Murray Head as the artist who provided us with the one-hit-wonder "One night in Bangkok". Again stop giggling at the word Bangkok. Apparently, the officials of Thailand were none too happy with this song. Let alone using it in any tourist board advertisments.

The intrigue gets deeper when you learn the song was written by former members of ABBA. Yes, the same band that was solely responsible for the Munich Massacre.

Speaking of Massacres, Kool-Aid is a brand of Kraft Foods Incorporated. That said, why do we spell Kool-Aid and Kraft with a K? To avoid the ambiguity of the oft-mispronouced C? No, I think not. In fact, K is a part of the larger Penguin Konspiracy.

By the way and For what it's worth....

There's something happening here. What it is ain't exactly clear. There's a man with a gun over there, telling me I got to beware. I think it's time we stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down.

Speaking of going down,


Bill Clinton has disappeared from Hillary's campaign in the last few weeks. It's got to be killing him. I'm suprised that he's been able to do it. The guy didn't want to be President. He wanted to be the winning Presidential Candidate. Sure, he's a policy wonk, a teflon Don, and McDonald's poster child. Not because it was part of his ethos, but because that's what you wanted him to be. In fact, he's like a bad sci-fi movie. You created him from inner-scary-secrets. This phenom is documented in the original Ghostbusters.

Now that we're talking about Ghostbusters, we can skip Ray Parker Jr. and examine the oddity which we know to be Walter Peck. There is a distinct lack of documentation showing William Atherton and Kenneth Brannaghghghghghhhh er Branah.. Branagh ever having appeared at the same location.

By the way, Ron Jeremy was in Ghostbusters. It's true. On the Internet and everything.

See, I told you I need something to do. Maybe I'll make fun of the upcoming Olympics. In all seriousness though, I hope ABBA stays away.

My relationship with beer.

Beer.

Beer and I go way back. Sure we've had our tough times, but it's always seemed to be a relationship for the ages.

Of course, just like any other relationship, we have our fights. We get together most times though, and it's just fine. Right now though, beer and I aren't talking again.

It started out as a great night. Beer and I were having a great time. Then I did something really stupid. I tried to spice up my relationship with beer by introducing Beer to Vodka. Vodka and I haven't talked in years. Vodka and I were really close at one time but we had a REAAAAALLLLLLY bad break-up and hadn't talked since.

But, on that magic night of a St. Patty's Day Party, Vodka was there. Vodka was sitting in little cups, mixed with J E L L O. Beer and I were having a great time. I trusted Beer and Beer trusted me. I, like all stupid people, decided I would try for a three-some. (You know everyone wants to do it once.) Anyway, I went for it.

Beer, Vodka, and I got our groove on. It was a fantasy-happy. We all passed out together.

Suddenly, in a cold sweat I awoke. Vodka and Beer we're having a battle in my stomach and my head. Both made a run for the door, leaving me alone with my headache and an intense urge to die.

Beer and I haven't talked since. I'd like to think we'll get back together. I didn't need more than you, Beer. I'm sorry Beer. I'll never think I need anything but Beer....

...If you'd only let me drink you without an instant gag reflex once again.

It's been about a year.

It's been about a year since I posted anything. Not that you noticed.

A lot can happen in a year. Your wife can leave you. Your friend can get cancer. You can believe that nothing is left to believe in.

That's what happened. Not that I want anyone to feel sorry for me. Certainly not. In fact, I'm not sure that I feel sorry for myself. I don't think I do. Rather, I believe I'm rather cold to the whole thing.

And while some my consider my plight rather intolerable; let us look at other people's lot.

Darfur: No one has systematically raped me nor lopped off my hands.

Iraq: I'm alive. I have the ability to write anything I want on this blog, yet I only do so when I get round to it.

China: Again, I can write or look at what I like without fear of being re-educated or executed.

Russia: While I can make jokes about the mismanagement or corruption of my government, I don't truly fear them. I have the ability to redress my greivences.

Afghanistan: I can enjoy my freedoms without fear of the next potential power. As much as I might dislike Obama, Clinton, or McCain - I do not have to fear retribution.

France: I'm not French. Enough said.

Yeah, I pay too much for gas, my dog is going to die, and my wife took me for everything I own. Sounds bad? In consideration of all it could be a lot worse. In fact, God be praised. All is well in my soul.

A simpler form of Crack.

I have a problem. See I admitted it!!!!

I found another online game to occupy additional precious moments of my life which could likely be put to better use. The game is a newer port of a German version of the same. Its a browser based market simulation. I'd be in a better situation if I wasn't determined to corner the market on bananas and hold the other users hostage, but alas Total World Domination waits for no man.

The game is free. You can pay 2 euros a month for some extra bits and pieces, but it's not necessary.

In contrast to my previous obsession with Ultima Online Housing, (which by the way paid for the down payment on my first real house) this game is much less intensive. The community are a very nice group of people and very helpful. So, check it out:

Kapilands


Smoke away. The first one is free.

Uhhhhh......

Nothing I would write could possibly add to this:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424337.stm

OK. Yes there is:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424937.stm

and...

It looks like an ordinary family scene, but Patrick is Susan's brother and they are lovers.

Uh oh...

"Why are disabled parents allowed to have children, or people with hereditary diseases or women over 40? No-one says that is a crime. " - Dr. Wilhelm

Oh geez...

Let's look at that again. A German Doctor questioning if disabled, diseased, or older people should have certain rights. How very "Lebensunwertes Leben" of him.

So let's look at Compulsory sterilization.

We have seen more than once that the public welfare may call upon the best citizens for their lives. It would be strange if it could not call upon those who already sap the strength of the State for these lesser sacrifices, often not felt to be such by those concerned, in order to prevent our being swamped with incompetence. It is better for all the world, if instead of waiting to execute degenerate offspring for crime, or to let them starve for their imbecility, society can prevent those who are manifestly unfit from continuing their kind. The principle that sustains compulsory vaccination is broad enough to cover cutting the Fallopian tubes.

Himmler? Hitler? Goebels? Goering? Mengele?

Nope.

Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes, US Supreme Court in writing the MAJORITY opinion in Buck V. Bell 274 U.S. 200

This opinion included the statement "Three generations of imbeciles are enough. "

Absofreakinglutely Despicable.