tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17270390397308373492024-03-19T02:06:47.905-07:00A perfect waste of bandwidth.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.comBlogger28125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-79909565271470187342009-07-07T01:46:00.000-07:002009-07-07T02:05:16.886-07:00Questions to the Author.Gunner and I thought we would take the opportunity to answer some of the thousands of daily questions we receive. So, in no particular order:<br /><br />1) Why in the name of all that is Holy, do you write this?<br />Gunner: Why do you think anything about this is Holy?<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Hummie</span>: Why in the name of anything do you read it?<br /><br />2) Do you agree with Hawking on the information paradox<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Hummie</span>: No. It has become quite apparent the paradox does not exist and, in fact, information escapes the event horizon.<br /><br />3)<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">WTF</span>?<br />Yes, but not if Nicolas <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Zarcozy</span> is elected to a second term.<br /><br />4)For whom did you vote in the 2008 election for President of the United States?<br />Gunner: While the appropriate English syntax is appreciated, I must make you aware I can not vote.<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Hummie</span>: Richard Nixon.<br /><br />5)Is light a wave or a particle?<br />Yes<br /><br />6)What do you call 2 left handed, black, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Liberian</span>, lesbians flying an airplane?<br />Both: Pilots<br /><br />7)Will you marry me?<br />Gunner: Yes<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Hummie</span>: Are you rich, <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">blond</span>, sexy, rich, and above all rich?<br /><br />8) As enlightened scientists, who do you believe is the worlds greatest artistic group?<br />Gunner: RUSH<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Hummie</span>: RUSH<br /><br />9) Is the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Hummie</span>, in fact, responsible for the Chambers Creek Explosion of 1994?<br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Hummies</span> Lawyer: No Comment<br /><br />10)Do you have a one word response to the meaning of life?<br />Yes.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-26031035787010320502009-06-28T21:18:00.001-07:002009-06-28T21:23:43.514-07:00What's the world coming to?Michael Jackson died this week. Oh well. He'll take 450,000 years to decay in a landfill.<br /><br />Farrah Fawcett died as well. At least she was nice to look at, at one time.<br /><br />Ed McMahon died. Thats not such a bad thing. Not that I wanted him to die, but he had a full life.<br /><br />This is where it goes bad. Billy Mays died. 1) He's not old enough. 2) Who is going to get me to buy things I really don't need?<br /><br />Ok. You're right. I don't need Billy to make impulse purchases, but he was fun.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-85430194490158454472009-06-27T18:20:00.000-07:002009-06-27T18:25:48.487-07:00Communists, Pirates, and Capitalism. Oh My!This is reprinted from the <a href="http://www.metro.co.uk/">Metro</a> newspaper in England.<br /><br /><blockquote>Thrill-seekers pay £3.5k to attack pirates<br /><br />Friday, June 26, 2009<br /><br />Russian cruise liner companies are offering pirate-hunting trips on<br />armed private yachts off the Somali coast.<br /><br />Passengers pay £3,500 a day<br />hoping to be attacked by raiders so they can retaliate with grenades, machine<br />guns and rockets.<br /><br />The ships cruise slowly close to the coast in an<br />attempt to attract the pirates. </blockquote><br />There is nothing I could possibly add to that scenario. Good times. Good times.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-74535202942664661902009-06-19T05:05:00.000-07:002009-06-27T17:51:28.252-07:00Sometimes blowing things up does the world good.If it weren't for the death, destruction, damage, hate, discontent, disease, famine, and general evil of warfare, its actually not a bad thing.<br /><br /><br />Next time you are crying over spilt milk, the loss of your Mittens the cat, or your cable bill; thank chemical warfare for helping you. You see, the <a href="http://www.kleenex.com/NA/Default.aspx">Kleenex</a> you use to evacuate your nostrils, is a development of the First World War. Since cotton was in high demand for all sorts of things including bandages, a need for another material arose for gas mask filters. Yup, Kleenex.<br /><br />There's a Nobel Prize for blowing things up. Actually, there is a <a href="http://nobelprize.org/">Nobel Prize </a>because of blowing things up. Alfred Nobel is the inventor of dynamite. Made quite a bit of money from that as well as owning the defense contractor Bofors. In his will Nobel left a lot of money to establish the Nobel Prize.<br /><div></div><br />As militaries became more and more adept at blowing each other up, field medicine came into it's own. The barber who previously would hack off your <a href="http://www.civilwarhome.com/medicinehistory.htm">injured limb </a>and sentence you to a miserable life has long given way to modern emergency medicine. Soldiers wounded in Iraq are making it from the incident site to an appropriate <a href="http://www.sg.af.mil/">medical receiving </a>center within an hour. Once stabilized they are in Germany within a day and sometimes home to the US for rehabilitative care within the week. Ambulance services, <a href="http://www.kingcounty.gov/healthServices/health/ems/MedicOne.aspx">Medic1</a>, and most emergency medical services can trace their history to military medicine.<br /><br /><div></div>However, when you absolutely, positively have to blow something up (really well) within minutes - you develop the <a href="http://history.nasa.gov/sputnik/">Space Program</a>. The great space race of the cold war was a function of the cold war. It had very little to do with exploration, national pride, or looking for little green people. It had everything to do with the ability to deliver a <a href="http://www.fas.org/nuke/guide/usa/icbm/index.html">nuclear warhead </a>across the globe quickly, accurately, and without needing an aircraft or even people to do it.<br /><br /><br /><p>As for blowing up things on large scales, the bombing of Nagasaki and Hiroshima were necessary. It was a horrible waste of human life. A single death in war is a waste. There are some who say it was unnecessary, that the casualties on the US side would not have been as high as predicted during the US invasion of Japan (<a href="http://www.history.army.mil/books/wwii/MacArthur%20Reports/MacArthur%20V1/ch13.htm">Operation Downfall</a>) at the end of World War II. Guess what? It's a war. You try to minimize civilian casualties, but I don't think I can agree to do so at the loss of friendly soldiers. </p><p>Next, if there had not been atomic bombs in Japan, I believe you would have seen a nuclear exchange in Europe within years. The destruction caused by the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki have made <a href="http://www.gwu.edu/~nsarchiv/NSAEBB/NSAEBB31/index.html">future nuclear attack </a>or retribution untenable. If the US had not dropped the bombs, it is quite conceivable the Cold War would have gone "Hot". In this way, the bombing also saved civilian lives.<br /></p><p>The greatest benefit of the bombing of Nagasaki and Hiroshima is more simple. If not for those events, we would have no large scale explosion to relate other events. I mean who can visualise Mount St. Helens being equated to 44.6quadrillion pop-its?<br /><br />Crop Circles? Well, those aren't military. Those are <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8118257.stm">kangaroos stoned </a>out of their minds with opium. </p>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-44025429263558780522009-06-18T17:31:00.000-07:002009-06-18T17:33:57.818-07:00A little more Iranian Goodness. Just Because.Its not that they dont want an islamic republic, theyre using the framework of Islam to ge to their goals. A little more background:<br /><br />Over 50% of the population in Iran was born after the 1979 Revolution. 75% of the population is in fact under 30 years old. This may be in part to the death toll of the Iran-Iraq War and the waves of humans killed. Did you know Mousavi was also the Prime Minister during the Iran - Iraq War?<br /><br />Ultimately, there appears to be a split in the Governing Hierarchy itself.<br /><br />I need to add a couple more characters to this story and another governmental body. The body is called the Expediency Council. This council arbitrates disputes between the Parliament and The Guardian Council.<br /><br />The Supreme Leader listens closely to the Expediency Council. The council is headed by former President Ayatollah Ali Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani. Ahmadeniejad had accused Rafsanjani of corruption, while Rafsanjani has been hurling nastys at the Supreme Leader.<br /><br />Rafsanjani and the the supporters of Mousavi may in fact be trying to have the current Supreme Leader, Grand Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, removed. Their favorite seems to be another Ayatollah and member of the Guardian Council, Ayatollah Montazeri. <br /><br />By the way, Rafsanjani may be open to dialog with the West.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-55182012181306206392009-06-18T02:02:00.000-07:002009-06-18T04:55:20.514-07:00A flock of Seagulls and The Green Revolution.<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uUjIA3Rt7gk">Iran. (So far away)</a><br /><br />If you have managed to avoid any sort of credible news outlet in the last week, you may not know there's some upheaval in Iran. Then again, if you're a major America Media Outlet, you probably did miss it.<br /><br />So here is the background:<br /><br />Blah blah ancient history blah blah 1921 <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Reza</span></span> Khan (not the star trek guy) overthrows the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Qajar</span></span> Dynasty and becomes Shah. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Reza</span></span> attempts to stop Soviet and British influence in Iran. Here comes world war <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">deuce</span>. Standby, because <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Reza</span></span> is starting to get friendly with <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">perennial</span> bad guy Hitler and company. The Soviets and Britain invade Iran and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">dipose</span></span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Reza</span></span> in 1941. They replace <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Reza</span></span> Khan - Shah with his son, <a title="Mohammad Reza Pahlavi" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohammad_Reza_Pahlavi">Mohammad <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Reza</span></span> Pahlavi</a>.<br /><br />In addition to the new Shah was an elected Prime Minister, <a class="mw-redirect" title="Mohammed Mossadegh" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohammed_Mossadegh"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Mohammed</span></span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Mossadegh</span></span></a>. He is a very popular man in 1951 and essentially controls the nations oil. That makes the US and allies pretty nervous. So in 2003 George Bush authorizes the invasion of... oh wait. What I meant to say was in 1953, President Dwight D. Eisenhower gives the green light to run something called Operation Ajax. The CIA and company essentially run a private coup and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Mossadegh</span></span> is hooked up. A new pro-Western guy gets the PM gig. His name is <a title="Fazlollah Zahedi" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fazlollah_Zahedi"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Fazlollah</span></span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">Zahedi</span></span></a> .<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">Zahedi</span></span> doesn't get to do much though because the Shah takes on more and more power. The country begins to modernize with western support. The shah also <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">suppresses</span> opposition with his security and intelligence forces.<br /><br />Enter <a title="Ayatollah" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ayatollah">Ayatollah</a> <a title="Ruhollah Khomeini" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ruhollah_Khomeini"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">Ruhollah</span></span> Khomeini</a>. Khomeini is not a fan of the Government or its actions. Khomeini criticizes the Shah and company. In 1964 Khomeini gets arrested, does 18 months in an Iranian prison and then is exiled. The exile world tour included Turkey, Iraq, and France. While on tour, he continues to say not-so-nice things about the Shah and the pro-Western government.<br /><br />This is where it gets good. Or not so good.<br /><br />Starting in early 1978 there are protests, civil disobedience, strikes, and mayhem. The economy falls apart. The Shah sees the writing on the wall and beats feet. In January 1979 Khomeini starts the Islamic Revolution Reunion Tour with a sold out show in Tehran. The military says they don't know <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">nuthin</span></span> bout birthing no babies and won't get involved to stop the Ayatollah.<br /><br />April 1st 1979, the Iranian people approve a national <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">referendum</span> to make Iran an Islamic Republic with a theocratic constitution.<br /><br />So what exactly is the structure of the Iranian Government? Imagine the southern baptist convention with suicide bombers. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">Ok</span></span>, its somewhat a modern democracy within an Islamic theocracy.<br /><br />At the top is the Supreme Leader, the Ayatollah. He is the highest ranking religious and political bearded guy in the country. He gets to pick the chiefs of the military, highest ranking judges, and 6 of the 12 members of something called the Guardian Council.<br /><br />The supreme leader is picked by an 86 member body called the Council of Experts.<br /><br />There is an elected President. Currently, <a href="http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/world/iran/ahmadinejad.htm">Mahmoud <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17">Ahmadinejad</span></span> </a>holds that job. He was elected in 2005. He reports to the Supreme Leader and is responsible for the management of the country and acts as the executive of the country. He also gets to appoint his cabinet which must be approved by an elected <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">Parliament</span>.<br /><br />Back to the Guardian Council and its 12 members. Remember the Supreme Leader gets to appoint half of the Council. The other half is chosen by the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">Parliament</span>. The Guardian Council can veto anything the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_24">Parliament</span> has to say or do. They also get to approve anyone who runs for office.<br /><br />The <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_25">Parliament</span> (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_26"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18">Maljis</span></span>) consists of 290 elected seats elected by popular vote. Of course, it's a popular vote of those who survive the Guardian Council's approval process.<br /><br />Right now, the Guardian Council and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_27"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">Maljis</span></span> are controlled by conservatives. As late as 2001 the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_28">Parliament</span> was a little more reform minded.<br /><br />Back to the present and enter <a href="http://www.mir-hosseinmousavi.com/">Mir <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_29"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20">Hossein</span></span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_30"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21">Mousavi</span></span></a>. He's selling himself as the Reformer. Ranting against much of the current political system. Interesting. Ask <a href="http://english.aljazeera.net/news/middleeast/2009/06/2009613181040285185.html"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_31"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">Azar</span></span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_32"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">Nafisi</span></span> </a>about it. You see, during the 1979 Islamic Revolution, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_33"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_24">Mousavi</span></span> became Prime Minister and implemented many of the repressive measures he now denounces. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_34"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_25">Nafisi</span></span> was a University Professor at an Institution <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_35"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_26">Mousavi</span></span> shut down.<br /><br />There was an election held on June 12<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_36"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_27">th</span></span>. The "official" results show <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_37"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_28">Ahmadinejad</span></span> getting 62 percent while <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_38"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_29">Mousavi</span></span> held about 34 percent. The truth of the matter, or at least the less dishonest versions that are somewhat independent, actually believe <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_39"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_30">Ahmadinejad</span></span> legitimately won the election. Just by a smaller margin.<br /><br />So why the protests? I'm still sorting that one out in my mind. Not so much why, but for what. The why is because they are upset they lost the election. Add to that, those in power made it look as though they lost by more. A legitimate recount would likely end up with the same outcome but closer race. Do the current actions of the establishment strike such a chord in the hearts of the Iranian people that a new election would provide for a different outcome?<br /><br />What about the US? We've thrown one coup party in Iran and they didn't even have a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_40">fledgling</span> nuke program at that time. Probably because Donald <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_41"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_31">Rumsfeld</span></span> was right when on <a href="http://www.defenselink.mil/transcripts/transcript.aspx?transcriptid=2636">02/12/02 he said</a>:<br /><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote>There are known <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_42"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_32">knowns</span></span>. There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don’t know.</blockquote><br />The last thing the United States wants right now is an unstable, potentially nuclear armed Iran on the border of Iraq. You see, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_43"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_33">Ahmadinejad</span></span> is a known known. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_44"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_34">Mousavi</span></span> is either a known unknown or unknown known. This is completely different from a known gnome.<br /><br />There is an <a href="https://sites.google.com/site/tatsumairanupdate/">interesting story </a>being published on <a href="http://www.fark.com/cgi/comments.pl?IDLink=4455489"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_45"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_35">Fark</span></span></a> and Google sites using Twitter services to get updates from Tehran and the protests. Take it for what it's worth, but perhaps worth reading. The writer asserts a call to prayer on Friday may be a big show down. The writer also claims approximately 5000 <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_46"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_36">Hizbollah</span></span> (Army of God) Fighters are running around dressed as Riot Police ready to do some dirty work.<br /><br />If you're interested in finding out more about this debacle check out the sources I used:<br /><br /><a href="http://www.voanews.com/english/" target="_blank">http://www.voanews.com/english/</a><br /><a href="http://english.aljazeera.net/" target="_blank">http://english.aljazeera.net/</a><br /><a href="http://www.stratfor.com/" target="_blank">http://www.stratfor.com/</a><br /><a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/" target="_blank">http://www.bbc.co.uk/</a><br /><a href="http://www.reuters.com/" target="_blank">http://www.reuters.com/</a><br /><a href="http://www.spiegel.de/international/" target="_blank">http://www.spiegel.de/international/</a><br /><a href="http://english.pravda.ru/" target="_blank">http://english.pravda.ru/</a><br /><a href="http://www.lemonde.fr/" target="_blank">http://www.lemonde.fr/</a><br /><a href="http://www.csmonitor.com/" target="_blank">http://www.csmonitor.com/</a><br /><a href="http://www.npr.org/" target="_blank">http://www.npr.org/</a><br /><a href="http://www.ap.org/" target="_blank">http://www.ap.org/</a><br /><a href="http://www.globalsecurity.org/">http://www.globalsecurity.org/</a><br /><a href="http://www.mir-hosseinmousavi.com/">http://www.mir-hosseinmousavi.com/</a>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-60445145450796135362009-06-12T17:52:00.000-07:002009-06-13T17:59:48.374-07:00Archaeologists vs. Johnnie CochranArchaeologists have it <a href="http://www.parishilton.com/">easy</a>. Sure there is peer review, but c'mon! They don't have to prove anything to the extent of a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OJ_Simpson_murder_trial">criminal investigation</a>.<br /><br />The scientists use DNA, biological, and carbon evidence. You ever notice how often during these site excavations they are bare handed, hair exposed, and dropping trace evidence of themselves and who knows what else all over the scene? <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Locard">Locard</a> anyone?<br /><br />I watched a documentary on a skeleton discovered in a mass grave in Egypt. The body had a substantial and likely fatal head wound. None of the internal organs remained. There was no regrowth of the skull. This means the skeleton was not alive after the damage and only that.<br /><br />A early weapons expert "duplicated" the wound using a rock and sling to hit a terracotta pot on a stick. The conclusion was the victim was a <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coptic_Christian">Coptic Christian </a>killed by <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172495/">Roman</a> soldiers.<br /><br />Wow. Must be nice. There is no discussion that the damage to the skull could have likely been post mortem. For craps sake, the body was in a mass grave. We all know how careful bodies are handled in mass graves. Any exculpatory evidence reference internal injury or disease garnered from an autopsy with all available information (the entire body) is unavailable. Since it's not available it's okay to ignore it in the world of archaeology.<br /><br />How about the wrongly accused Roman Soldier. Prove to me the soldier was the one who slung the rock. The likelihood that slings were widely available is pretty good. There could have been a second rocker. Not to mention friendly rocking.<br /><br />It's not like you can do chemical analysis of the explosives used to blow the target to pieces. More simply, no ballistics on the rock supposedly used to kill this skeleton. Again, we don't know the skeleton was alive when he received the skull damage.<br /><br />The best archaeologists likely couldn't get a <a href="http://www.judgejudy.com/">Judge</a> to agree there is even a crime, let alone probable cause to charge someone. Heaven help them with a jury. No chance when a defense attorney attacks their conclusions.<br /><br />Like I said, it must be nice. I'd say the Roman Soldier has a good civil rights violation case.<br /><br />I hate suspense and television has allowed me to avoid it.<br /><br />The perfect example is <a href="http://www.nbc.com/Law_and_Order/">Law and Order</a>. Its a glorious thing. The beginning of the show is someone finding a body, some clues and at 15 minutes past the hour a suspect is developed. Half past the hour, bad guy is in custody and the legal wranglings start. There's 15 minutes of legal arguments about some take of criminal court rule 3.5 and 3.6. With 15 minutes left, maybe a new piece of evidence or strange twist to be battled by the Prosecutor. At the end of the hour, all is well.<br /><br />Any deviation from the above itinerary means the arrestee is not the right guy. I don't have to worry about something terrible happening to the cast now, because, quite frankly, its 47 minutes after the hour. All will be well in 13 minutes.<br /><br />Life, sadly, does not adhere to this.<br /><br />Stupid reality. Maybe the archaeologists are finding the bodies at 47 minutes after the hour.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-43519559221834583952009-06-12T03:39:00.001-07:002009-06-12T05:58:02.588-07:00Speaking of...Speaking of gravity...<br /><br />What do you mean? Well I was talking about it and it's my blog so if you don't like it you can leave. There will still be millions of people looking at it.<br /><br /><br />Oh fine. Thousands.<br /><br /><br />Crap. Okay 4 people will still read this blog. 3 of which are my mother, my psychiatrist, and the guy with the black helicopter from the <a href="http://www.nsa.gov/">NSA</a>. (I think he's onto me.)<br /><br /><br />That being said, if you drilled a <a href="http://www.courtneylove.com/">hole</a> completely through the earth and jumped into it you would accelerate all the way to the center of the planets mass. Your momentum would then propel you past the center. At which point you would begin to decelerate at the same rate you initially accelerated until you reached the far side of the Earth.<br /><br /><br />Now, I recommend you stop and hold onto the other side of the Earth. If you don't you're going to drop back toward your other side of the earth starting point. I expect you could encounter loss of momentum due to drag and eventually get stuck in the 5000 degree liquid metal center of the Earth.<br /><br />Speaking of Drag. US Senator Slade <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Gorton</span> goes away and Congresswoman Jennifer Dunn appears. Coincidence?<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/81/Slade_Gorton%2C_official_Senate_photo_portrait.jpg/474px-Slade_Gorton%2C_official_Senate_photo_portrait.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 321px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 447px" alt="" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/81/Slade_Gorton%2C_official_Senate_photo_portrait.jpg/474px-Slade_Gorton%2C_official_Senate_photo_portrait.jpg" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/83/Jenniferdunn.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 197px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 253px" alt="" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/83/Jenniferdunn.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />Speaking of something not even remotely related (not even in my brain), you ever wonder what TV censorship sounds like for <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080801/">African Click </a>Languages?<br /><br />Speaking of things that pop-up, Doctors are out of control. They're pushing <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Viagra</span> on kids. (<a href="http://fn.bmjjournals.com/cgi/content/abstract/90/6/F527">Legitimate reference here</a>.)<br /><br />If you do go to the above mentioned NSA website, you'll get a browser notification telling you the website wants to install a media player extension. Yes, <em>that</em> sounds like a good idea. Then again, I went to their office and I got this microchip in my brain. Its worked for me so far.<br /><br /><br />Good news on the <a href="http://www.vanillaice.com/main.htm">Uighur</a> front. According to the <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8096335.stm">BBC</a> they have their choice of tropical island to live on. Some of em are headed from Guantanamo to Bermuda.<br /><br />Personally....<br /><p><br /></p><p><a href="http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/45906000/jpg/_45906611_freedom_ap.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 466px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 260px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/45906000/jpg/_45906611_freedom_ap.jpg" border="0" /></a> ... Maybe they need to make better use of sign space and put a longer message in the blank space. I might be a bit more sympathetic to their cause if they gave me more background on why they "need to freedom". They really need to sell themselves. Better yet come to the capitalistic dark side and sell some <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">advertisement</span> rights to that space. What would work... maybe a spot from Steve's Water Boarding Supplies?</p><p>Speaking of selling things, the economy must be really bad. The availability of velvet Elvis paintings is at an all time low. Probably because everyone has switched to their obsession of the <a href="https://www.getsnuggie.com/"><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Snuggie</span></a>. </p><p>Lastly, speaking of Elvis, he isn't dead. He simply is stuck in the center of the 5000 degree Earth.</p><p>PS The websites for NSA and Rob van Winkle both want to install the same media <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">extension</span>. Subsequently, Vanilla Ice is actually a tool of the NSA to control the minds of the masses. Nah, he's just a tool. </p>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-15225730777260456952009-06-10T01:58:00.000-07:002009-06-10T05:10:38.755-07:00Apophenia Matters!It's all in the details. Details the media won't tell you about. Yet, I shall waste your time with them. You'd expect no less.<br /><br />The United States Shadow Government is at it again. True American <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Art_Bell">Art Bell </a>has been banished from the country by those <a href="http://www.illuminati-news.com/moriah.htm#2">Illuminati</a> -<a href="http://educate-yourself.org/nwo/">New World Order </a>types. Just because the guys tells the truth about things like Bigfoot, UFO's, Area 51, and other staples of the lunatic fringe, er well-informed. That or Immigration lost his wife's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Art_Bell#Immigration_Controversy">paperwork</a>.<br /><br />The good news, for some, is <a href="http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/facility/guantanamo-bay.htm">Gitmo</a> has been discombobulated and people are being sent to other places. Some of them like Gitmo better than home. A group of <a href="http://www.napavalleyregister.com/articles/2009/06/10/ap/politics/d98nj9h80.txt">Chinese Islamic Extremists </a>have determined to not be "Enemy Combantants". They were just "Enemy Thinkers About Doing Bad Thingers". If they are sent home, they will be tortured and executed. Hell, at least Gitmo didn't do the whole public execution thing. Ergo, Gitmo is better than China.<br /><br />They will get to live in their own personal version of Survivor Palau. Interestingly enough, these people are called Uighur. Though the word is pronounced the same, it is completely different than a descriptor of Vanilla Ice.<br /><br />Speaking of dead careers, another foot has been found <a href="http://www.kirotv.com/news/19682506/detail.html">detached from it's body</a>. There's a lot of that <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/06/18/canada.feet/index.html">going around </a>here. I've been trying to arrange a reasonable explanation from this. I think it must be out there. Other than previously mentioned purple lesbian chinchillas gone rabid, I'm at a bit of a loss. Stranger things have happened. I mean people like Kid Rock for craps sake. Maybe its a form of Swine Flu.<br /><br />Apophenia can be described as finding significance in insignificant phenomena. I supposed that's what this blog is all about. It also describes my favorite radio show. <a href="http://mynorthwest.com/?nid=93">TBTL</a>. In the words of Ferris Bueler - If you have the means, I highly recommend it.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-26896161368344185052008-05-09T10:32:00.000-07:002009-06-10T03:26:12.429-07:00Physics chooses the third option<p>Does light have mass? If light does have mass, does your weight change at night? This is probably another reason some people turn off the lights during... never mind.<br /><br />What the hell is mass?<br /><br />Mass can be expressed as a function of energy. Well, the energy of something divided by the squared speed of light. m=E/c^2.<br /><br />What?<br /><br />There are a number of definitions of mass which include:<br />The quantity of matter in an object.<br />The measurable property of an object to resist change in its state of motion when force is applied. (Perhaps not a definition, but you can see the effect of mass as the gravitational force exhibited by said mass on another mass. This is the definition used by Einstein in his theory of Special Relativity as the mass-energy equivalent. ) </p><p>Mass is experienced as weight here on Earth. Weight is the mass of an item subsequent to the effective gravity sum of all other objects within the system. In lesser gravity environments objects weigh less, but retain the same mass. In fact, depending on where you are on Earth, your weight may change. Mass multiplied by a gravitational state is the weight. (mg=weight)<br /></p><br /><p>Mass is also one observable information about a thing.<br /><br />Matter is anything that possesses gravitation and inertia. So matter has mass, but does it mean everything that has mass is matter? No matter...<br /><br />Inertia is the tendency of matter to resist change to its state of movement or non-movement.<br /><br />Isn't this the same as one of the above definitions of mass? Actually the mass of the object defines its inertial qualities in combination with force. So inertia depends on mass and force. Inertia changes but mass is constant.<br /><br />Gravitation is the shared attraction between objects. These objects are masses or have mass.<br /><br />Momentum is a measure of how much a thing is moving somewhere. Mass multiplied by velocity is the momentum. (p=mv) This momentum can be measured as a force exerted by light. Light has momentum. We know it has a velocity (299,792,458 m/s) and since it has momentum we can see in this line light has mass.<br /><br />Potential Energy = mass x acceleration of gravity x height (PE=mgh). We know mass is constant and gravity is dependent on the mass of the gravitating body or bodies. Add to that, height, and we have potential energy. (This assumes a mass providing gravity and a lesser massed object at some distance from the greater body.) Any mass has an associated energy, or more correctly; an “energy equivalence”. That energy (E) is equal to mass (m) multiplied by the speed of light squared (c^2). (E=mc^2.)<br /><br />Hey… Nothing can move faster than the speed of light, so how can you square it? (Actually, this doesn't indicate an increase of the speed of light. Rather, since you are equating Energy to mass, it's a conversion factor for the equation.) Equally we can define the speed of light as the square root of the known Energy of an object system divided by its mass. (Good luck with it but E/m=c^2) </p><br /><p>Let’s define the mass of a particle as its rest mass. There is a problem with doing this because it denies movement and subsequently we're kind of screwed with previous assumptions.<br /><br />Getting sucked into a black hole does it lose it's light but not it's mass. Light is a wave-particle. Well it presents itself like it is. Relative mass is total energy divided c2 (e/c2=m). Given the mass of anything, multiplying it by the speed of light squared should provide it's energy. We now have every piece of information about the system. Unless it goes past the event horizon. Stupid paradox.</p><p>Since something gets sucked into a black hole and cant escape does it stop at the center including its subatomic particles and subsequently render its energy: zero? Equally does its mass increases relationally and add mass to the hole? Since you can’t see anything beyond the event horizon and light cant escape but nothing can be destroyed, is it really bright in there? Or is stuff really massive? </p><p>So when the weight (That stupid mass thing in a given gravitational field) is so high because the gravity is so high the velocity of an object system is less than the required escape velocity for that black hole. If light loses it's mass but retains its energy it can escape, but then its no longer light, just energy? Can energy exist disembodied from some mass? </p><p>Since energy is dependent upon the speed of light in the equation<br /><br />How does the speed of light effect gravity? Can the gravity of a black hole be limited because the speed of light is constant? Can the speed of light be affected by the mass of a black hole? If the speed of light is the fastest thing period, yet gravity can be shown to be dependent on the speed of light and thus limited, light should be able to escape a black hole.<br /><br />The gravity of a black hole, while immense, must be a real and definable quantity and not infinite.<br /><br />Since light cannot theoretically escape a black hole.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU_Dc9qhvcDJ1JiL-sNUnkx6pI5Qoi8OtLWB0CTmy-TYNTB9XbKlmUYM0P_nmfpyxIPbD9MJv85zaf16CT8R8ifU7XfU4qX9eTEjGLiyt2cuQdDSaIpVSetqwentS1NGPoYYQYCsmJP5E/s1600-h/4holes2.JPG"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5202762950197061810" style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgU_Dc9qhvcDJ1JiL-sNUnkx6pI5Qoi8OtLWB0CTmy-TYNTB9XbKlmUYM0P_nmfpyxIPbD9MJv85zaf16CT8R8ifU7XfU4qX9eTEjGLiyt2cuQdDSaIpVSetqwentS1NGPoYYQYCsmJP5E/s320/4holes2.JPG" border="0" /></a><br /></p><p><br /><br /><br />Assume you have 4 black holes (s, t, u, v), equidistant, of equal strength, and with their absolute centers on one plane. Their spheres of influence (at which they deny the escape of light) intersect at one finite point on the plane, x=0 and y=0. A source of light is aligned to this point on the z axis, transecting the above plane at (r) x=0, y=0. What the hell happens?<br /><br />The light arrives within the area of effect of all four black holes. They all pull irresistibly and equally. Does the light suspend motion?<br /></p><p>The whole farking thing doesn't work for me. Unless this. What happens if the black hole accelerates the speed of light beyond the speed of light and the accelerated speed of light is faster than the speed of information. Can information actually be faster than the speed of light? Wow, Einstein would be wrong.</p><p><br />Mark Twain said “Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.” To which I add “Physics chooses the third option.” </p>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-86190071965416849442008-04-29T23:38:00.000-07:002008-05-04T00:08:15.156-07:00The event horizon has been delayed.I am sorry to inform all of you, the event horizon has been delayed for approximately 2 weeks while a defective light is being replaced. You may ask, how did anyone know the light beyond the event horizon had gone out? Many more however will ask, what's the <a href="http://www.rdrop.com/users/green/school/horizon.htm">event horizon</a>? I'll get back to that later.<br /><br />I took a quiz about depression and I failed. There are at least 6 people more depressed and crazy than I am. At this point, I think I would fail a urine test.<br /><br />I changed the blog colors. Why? Just because I could.<br /><br />OK, back to the event horizon thing. The event horizon can be defined as a boundary in spacetime, from beyond which nothing can be observed. In general relativity space and time are completely intertwined. Bend space you bend time. Bend time and you bend space. Therein, you can travel anywhere instantly if you can bend space without breaking it. Given a pair of wire cutters and a clue about the programmers family I could hack the password and break both. (<a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts/generic/8f52/">Sidenote: The perfect T-shirt for me</a>)<br /><br />We start with the black hole. No, not her. A black hole is thought to be a <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/thing">thing</a> (technical term) with absolute definition and such mass (and subsequently gravity) that nothing can escape it's grasp. This would include light and stuff defined as "<a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/anything">anything</a>".<br /><br />Since that which we see is a function of things, or in the case of seeing them, light, we can not see anything beyond this boundary. The bigger the black hole, the greater the grasp and the less we will see.<br /><br />So, if <a href="http://apwob.blogspot.com/2008/04/back-to-cat.html">THE CAT</a> is beyond the event horizon, even if we attempted to see what the cat was doing we couldn't. Does that mean we wouldn't influence the outcome? (<a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts/sciencemath/6dff/">Schrodie's Cat T-Shirt</a>)<br /><br />Nevermind.<br /><br />The thing (different but still technical term) that gets me, is what the hell happens to all that stuff. Take our favorite scalar physical quantity known as energy. According to the <a href="http://library.thinkquest.org/2745/data/lawce1.htm">law of conservation of energy</a> Energy can not be created or destroyed. Its a LAW and it's on the interweb so:<br /><ol><li>must be true </li><li>don't screw with it. </li></ol><p>So, nothing can be destroyed and nothing can escape the hole. So what exactly is going on in there?<br /><br />Entropy (Another LAW) basically states that all things are moving from a state of order to disorder. (Wait, how does evolution work then???) Yet, you have a collection of energy which cannot escape the event horizon. Stupid Chaos Theory.<br /><br />What is going on in there is very similar to a small child <a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/07/05/national/main3021915.shtml">losing their intestines </a>to a swimming pool cleaning system. (Sadly, the poor girl has died.)<br /><br />None the less, where does it go? Damn it!!!!!! Its annoying me. I can't get over this. Are you with me? You can't destroy or create energy. (<a href="http://apwob.blogspot.com/2007/03/collision-avoidance-theory.html">Everything is energy</a>.) It goes beyond the horizon and disappears <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0108037/">forever</a>. But everything is going from order to disorder.<br /><br />Right at the heart of this is the gravitational or spacetime singularity. You can only measure this in infinite terms. Holy crap. Infinity? Wait, what happens if I bust past the event horizon at infinite speed?<br /><br />Better yet, according to <a href="http://archive.ncsa.uiuc.edu/Cyberia/NumRel/GenRelativity.html">General Relativity</a> (<a href="http://www.nasa.gov/worldbook/relativity_worldbook.html">actual NASA link</a>) the Big Bang occurred at one, single, finite, specific, uno, point. Yet a singularity occurs within all these black holes. Okay, you're right, these are curvature singularities.<br /><br />Actually, singularities are commonly separated as conical and curvature singularities. The differences is whether or not they have an <strong>event horizon</strong>.<br /><br />I'm guessing there some serious wackiness going on. I suspect the oil companies are involved too.<br /><br />Did I mention <strong>I'M SINGLE?</strong></p>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-48253783476089679122008-04-15T10:08:00.000-07:002008-04-15T10:11:12.529-07:00Back to the Cat.Schrodengers cat has so many good uses. 1)Homework 2)Prompt arrival for work or dinner 3) Every fight you have ever had with a spouse.<br /><br />OK, you all want to know about this cat. The cat is dead and not dead. The outcome of any future scenario is unknown. The only way to know the outcome is post facto. If you observe the incident you influence the outcome. (The cat was and was not and is and is not long before refrigerators had lights.) So ultimately everything in the future exists with all possible outcomes. The part people don't like is when there is a bad outcome. You only know the outcome because you observed it. Ergo, it's your fault for looking.<br /><br />1) Yes I did my homework unless you asked me for it. Therefor, I don't have it because you wanted it.<br /><br />2) I was both early and late for this important engagement. I was on time until you asked.<br /><br />3) Yes Dear. I did say that, but you can't be mad because you wouldn't have been mad if you hadn't asked me. I rightly may have had a completely different answer had you not asked.<br /><br />It's everyone else's fault. Except the cat. But since you read this <strong>YOU</strong> made it the cats fault. Or not.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-70068547514063240192008-03-22T21:28:00.000-07:002008-05-04T17:13:49.206-07:00Something to do.<div>I need something to do. I'm as bored as a Priest at a Girls' Choir practice.<br /><br />It's not that I don't have things I should be doing. I don't want to to do those because they're not fun. So, I guess more specifically, I need something fun to do. The problem is there is a direct correlation between fun and incarceration. The better the ideas I have and more fun things tend to be for me, the longer the <a href="http://www.drugpolicy.org/drugwar/mandatorymin/">minimum mandatory sentencing</a> guidelines are.<br /><br />It's not that I'm trying to harm anyone or anything. It's just a distinct lack of any semblance of a sense of humor on the part of the government. Albeit true, I work for said government carefully dispensing anti-fun. That doesn't mean I don't appreciate the art.<br /><br />To take a completely unrelated example, I present to you Murray Head.<br /><br />Murray Head you ask? Yes, and stop giggling you ninny. You will recall Murray Head as the artist who provided us with the one-hit-wonder "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDh3tu49obc">One night in Bangkok</a>". Again stop giggling at the word Bangkok. Apparently, the officials of Thailand were none too happy with this song. Let alone using it in any tourist board advertisments.<br /><br />The intrigue gets deeper when you learn the song was written by former members of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ABBA">ABBA</a>. Yes, the same band that was solely responsible for the <a href="http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1137646-1,00.html">Munich Massacre</a>.<br /><br />Speaking of Massacres, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonestown">Kool-Aid </a>is a brand of Kraft Foods Incorporated. That said, why do we spell Kool-Aid and Kraft with a K? To avoid the ambiguity of the oft-mispronouced C? No, I think not. In fact, K is a part of the larger Penguin Konspiracy.<br /><br />By the way and For what it's worth....<br /><br />There's something happening here. What it is ain't exactly clear. There's a man with a gun over there, telling me I got to beware. I think it's time we stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down.<br /><br />Speaking of going down,<br /><a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/57/Monica_lewinsky.jpg/175px-Monica_lewinsky.jpg"><img style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/57/Monica_lewinsky.jpg/175px-Monica_lewinsky.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Bill Clinton has disappeared from Hillary's campaign in the last few weeks. It's got to be killing him. I'm suprised that he's been able to do it. The guy didn't want to be President. He wanted to be the winning Presidential Candidate. Sure, he's a policy wonk, a teflon Don, and McDonald's poster child. Not because it was part of his ethos, but because that's what you wanted him to be. In fact, he's like a bad sci-fi movie. You created him from inner-scary-secrets. This phenom is documented in the original Ghostbusters.<br /><br />Now that we're talking about Ghostbusters, we can skip Ray Parker Jr. and examine the oddity which we know to be Walter Peck. There is a distinct lack of documentation showing William Atherton and Kenneth Brannaghghghghghhhh er Branah.. Branagh ever having appeared at the same location.<br /></div><div><br /><br /><a href="http://871565.web001.whp.server-hosting.com/Gallery/ActorsA/653-7175.gif"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px;" src="http://871565.web001.whp.server-hosting.com/Gallery/ActorsA/653-7175.gif" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><a href="http://871565.web001.whp.server-hosting.com/Gallery/ActorsA/653-7175.gif"></a><br /><br /><a href="http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/MMPH/226872~Kenneth-Branagh-Posters.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/MMPH/226872~Kenneth-Branagh-Posters.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br /><a href="http://www.chiquita.com/announcements/press_room/Image_library/products/Single_Banana.gif"><img style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://www.chiquita.com/announcements/press_room/Image_library/products/Single_Banana.gif" border="0" /></a><br />By the way, Ron Jeremy was in Ghostbusters. It's <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087332/fullcredits#cast">true</a>. On the Internet and everything.<br /><br />See, I told you I need something to do. Maybe I'll make fun of the upcoming Olympics. In all seriousness though, I hope ABBA stays away.</div>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-67900382378345439832008-03-17T22:40:00.001-07:002008-03-17T22:53:38.033-07:00My relationship with beer.Beer.<br /><br />Beer and I go way back. Sure we've had our tough times, but it's always seemed to be a relationship for the ages.<br /><br />Of course, just like any other relationship, we have our fights. We get together most times though, and it's just fine. Right now though, beer and I aren't talking again.<br /><br />It started out as a great night. Beer and I were having a great time. Then I did something really stupid. I tried to spice up my relationship with beer by introducing Beer to Vodka. Vodka and I haven't talked in years. Vodka and I were really close at one time but we had a REAAAAALLLLLLY bad break-up and hadn't talked since.<br /><br />But, on that magic night of a St. Patty's Day Party, Vodka was there. Vodka was sitting in little cups, mixed with J E L L O. Beer and I were having a great time. I trusted Beer and Beer trusted me. I, like all stupid people, decided I would try for a three-some. (You know everyone wants to do it once.) Anyway, I went for it. <br /><br />Beer, Vodka, and I got our groove on. It was a fantasy-happy. We all passed out together.<br /><br />Suddenly, in a cold sweat I awoke. Vodka and Beer we're having a battle in my stomach and my head. Both made a run for the door, leaving me alone with my headache and an intense urge to die.<br /><br />Beer and I haven't talked since. I'd like to think we'll get back together. I didn't need more than you, Beer. I'm sorry Beer. I'll never think I need anything but Beer....<br /><br />...If you'd only let me drink you without an instant gag reflex once again.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-49311484249953464192008-03-02T22:39:00.000-08:002008-03-02T22:56:14.299-08:00It's been about a year.It's been about a year since I posted anything. Not that you noticed.<br /><br />A lot can happen in a year. Your wife can leave you. Your friend can get cancer. You can believe that nothing is left to believe in. <br /><br />That's what happened. Not that I want anyone to feel sorry for me. Certainly not. In fact, I'm not sure that I feel sorry for myself. I don't think I do. Rather, I believe I'm rather cold to the whole thing. <br /><br />And while some my consider my plight rather intolerable; let us look at other people's lot.<br /><br />Darfur: No one has systematically raped me nor lopped off my hands.<br /><br />Iraq: I'm alive. I have the ability to write anything I want on this blog, yet I only do so when I get round to it.<br /><br />China: Again, I can write or look at what I like without fear of being re-educated or executed.<br /><br />Russia: While I can make jokes about the mismanagement or corruption of my government, I don't truly fear them. I have the ability to redress my greivences.<br /><br />Afghanistan: I can enjoy my freedoms without fear of the next potential power. As much as I might dislike Obama, Clinton, or McCain - I do not have to fear retribution.<br /><br />France: I'm not French. Enough said.<br /><br />Yeah, I pay too much for gas, my dog is going to die, and my wife took me for everything I own. Sounds bad? In consideration of all it could be a lot worse. In fact, God be praised. All is well in my soul.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-88760476109590546802007-03-20T20:21:00.000-07:002007-03-28T04:22:34.608-07:00A simpler form of Crack.<a href="http://www.kapilands.com/main.php4?werber=32046"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px;" src="http://www.kapilands.com/pics/banner1.jpg" border="0" alt="" /></a><br /><br /><br><br />I have a problem. See I admitted it!!!!<br /><br />I found another online game to occupy additional precious moments of my life which could likely be put to better use. The game is a newer port of a German version of the same. Its a browser based market simulation. I'd be in a better situation if I wasn't determined to corner the market on bananas and hold the other users hostage, but alas Total World Domination waits for no man.<br /><br />The game is free. You can pay 2 euros a month for some extra bits and pieces, but it's not necessary.<br /><br />In contrast to my previous obsession with Ultima Online Housing, (which by the way paid for the down payment on my first real house) this game is much less intensive. The community are a very nice group of people and very helpful. So, check it out:<br /><br /><a href="http://www.kapilands.com">Kapilands</a><br /><br /><br />Smoke away. The first one is free.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-54148227911640710012007-03-12T04:41:00.000-07:002007-03-13T18:48:46.063-07:00Uhhhhh......Nothing I would write could possibly add to this:<br /><br /><a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424337.stm">http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424337.stm</a><br /><br />OK. Yes there is:<br /><br /><a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424937.stm">http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/6424937.stm</a><br /><br />and...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><blockquote>It looks like an ordinary family scene, but Patrick is Susan's brother and they are lovers. </blockquote><br />Uh oh...<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><blockquote>"Why are disabled parents allowed to have children, or people with hereditary diseases or women over 40? No-one says that is a crime. " - Dr. Wilhelm </blockquote><p></p><p></p>Oh geez...<br /><br />Let's look at that again. A German Doctor questioning if disabled, diseased, or older people should have certain rights. How very "Lebensunwertes Leben" of him.<br /><br />So let's look at Compulsory sterilization.<br /><br /><br /><blockquote>We have seen more than once that the public welfare may call upon the best citizens for their lives. It would be strange if it could not call upon those who already sap the strength of the State for these lesser sacrifices, often not felt to be such by those concerned, in order to prevent our being swamped with incompetence. It is better for all the world, if instead of waiting to execute degenerate offspring for crime, or to let them starve for their imbecility, society can prevent those who are manifestly unfit from continuing their kind. The principle that sustains compulsory vaccination is broad enough to cover cutting the Fallopian tubes. </blockquote><br />Himmler? Hitler? Goebels? Goering? Mengele?<br /><br />Nope.<br /><br />Justice <a title="Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr." href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oliver_Wendell_Holmes%2C_Jr.">Oliver Wendell Holmes,</a> US Supreme Court in writing the <strong><em>MAJORITY</em></strong> opinion in Buck V. Bell <a class="external text" title="http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?navby=" href="http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/scripts/getcase.pl?navby=CASE&court=US&vol=274&page=200" rel="nofollow" page="200" court="US&vol=">274 U.S. 200</a><br /><br />This opinion included the statement "Three generations of imbeciles are enough. "<br /><br />Absofreakinglutely Despicable.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-65483414148525600522007-03-12T03:14:00.000-07:002007-03-12T04:08:58.370-07:00More reasons why Sean Connery is Bond.Roger Moore is a terrible spy and Sean Connery is BOND. Period.<br /><br />Marie-Ségolène Royal is a socialist candidate for President in France. Some of you may already have assigned two strikes against her just from that sentence.<br /><br />She is the sister of Gérard Royal. Gérard was previously an agent of the La Direction Générale de la Sécurité Extérieure (Frenchanese for the General Directorate of External Security.) The DGSE is tasked with working outside the physical borders of France to find new and exciting people to whom they can wave white flags.<br /><br />Actually, I don't believe that at all. In fact it's rather tiresome to hear Americans complain about "Saving France during World War II." Anyone care to remember the French role in the American Revolution? Still, it's cheap easy humor. Can't go wrong.<br /><br />Getting back to Gerard. Gerard has been implicated in the 1985 invasion (on purpose no-less) of Aukland Harbour in New Zealand. Once the French had slipped through the NZAC defenses, they sank the Rainbow Warrior - completely misinterpreting the bumper sticker.<br /><br />From the Rainbow Warrior - turned man-made reef - we digress to Jacques Cousteau. A man who delighted us all with the wonders of the sea. Many of you don't know that Jacques had a long-running romance with "Flipper." In fact they had a child together. That child was:<br /><br />Keiko.<br /><br />John Denver wrote a song about Cousteau called "Calypso". This occurred just before Denver went down like a flaming yard dart and joined the Rainbow Warrior. Some of you may be confused and believe Calypso was written by Harry Belafonte. Actually, Harry Belafonte was a calypso musician.<br /><br />Harry Belafonte is / was a number of things. One of those things is a friend of the NRA. You protest?<br /><br />When I say NRA, clearly I mean Moses. On 08/28/1963 Belafonte and some other people, about 250,000 other people, were in the common-sense-blackhole known as Washington DC. Belafonte (and the 250k) listened to a speech popularly dubbed "I have a dream" amongst the other speakers. The march was entitled "March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom."<br /><br />NRA? I'm getting there.<br /><br />Included in the 250k were Bob Dylan, Sidney Poitier, Marlon Brando, Joan Baez, "Peter, Paul and Mary (who incidentally are all the same person) and - Moses aka Charlton Heston. Moses would later buy the NRA on profits he made when he spun off portions of the 17 commandments. Today, of course, we know the core industry to be very profitable as the "10 Commandments."<br /><br />Clearly you understand then that Belafonte is a big fan of the NRA. That said we take the next logical step. The Muppets. (He was on the show in 1978)<br /><br />The Muppet Show consisted of 120 episodes between 1976 and 1981.<br /><br />Episode 24 of season 5. Who's the guest star? Roger Moore. Did I mention this is the last episode? Roger Moore drove the Muppets into the ground!!!! Damn him.<br /><br />You protest and say Connery was never on the show, so how can I compare them? He was in every freaking episode. You never saw him. He's just that freaking good as Bond.<br /><br />In summary:<br /><br />French socialists nuke rainbow as seen by Cousteau who was liked by Denver not Belafonte who is the NRA as allowed by Moses on the Muppet Show which was ruined by Moore despite the fact Connery could have saved everyone.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-55580034221576190072007-03-08T18:45:00.000-08:002007-03-09T00:35:22.073-08:00Oh the material..... It's Wikilicious.How do you recover from a PR disaster which results from publishing questionable information? Position yourself to provide more questionable information, in a new format, and now make money doing it!<br /><br />Because I can't avoid the opportunity to feel better about myself by kicking <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Veracity">Wikipedia</a> when they're down, I will now address the irony of a <a href="http://news.com.com/Wikipedia+founder+says+search+engine+in+the+works/2100-1038_3-6165767.html?tag=nefd.top">Wikia Search Engine </a>.<br /><br />We've skimmed over the earlier Wiki-Scandal in a previous entry. Theres quite a bit of bloggismosism about it. You can find a fairly reasonable and believable discourse from Andrew Lih at his <a href="http://www.andrewlih.com/blog/">blog</a>. But since you're already here, I'll give you my unreasonable and questionable view.<br /><br /><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Essjay">Ryan Jordan</a>, if that's his real name, has now provided an endless, renewable, source of fuel to the Wikihater's fire. Mr. Jordan was a prolific member and Evangelist of Wikiaism. He eventually was hired by <a href="http://wikia.com/">Wikia</a> in January of 2007. On his user page "Essjay", as he was known in the Wikipedia community, provided a rather substantial Curriculum Vitae to lend veracity to his work.<br /><br /><blockquote><p><em>I am also a tenured professor of theology; feel free to have a look at my Wikipedia userpage to gain an idea of my background and credentials. </em></p></blockquote>I'd cite the reference but sadly:<br /><br /><blockquote><p><em>This user subpage belonged to User:Essjay, who has left Wikipedia. It has been deleted from Wikipedia per Essjay's request, as part of his right to vanish.</em></p></blockquote><p><em></em></p>He had a Ph.D which he <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Imprimatur&diff=prev&oldid=12614544">referenced</a> to support his conclusions.<br /><br />He offered his credentials in reply to those who question the validity of Wikipedia:<br /><br /><blockquote><p><em>I've contacted a few professors after other Wikipedians have pointed out that the instructor made the "Wikipedia is not a reliable source" argument to students who were, in fact, Wikipeidans. I have a copy of my form response at [wiki citation - removed by blogger]. <b>When I was head of my department</b>, I certainly would have taken knowledge of such conduct into consideration, and I think similarly minded department heads/deans would as well. .... 04:41, 7 April 2006 (UTC)</em></p></blockquote><br /><br />In the summer of 2006, The New Yorker Magazine published an <a href="http://www.newyorker.com/archive/2006/07/31/060731fa_fact">article </a>about Wikipedia which included a profile of Essjay. The article was written by Pulitzer Prize Winner Stacy Schiff.<br /><br /><blockquote>...a regular user known as Essjay, who serves as an administrator to check against site abuses. </blockquote>It's a good thing. We wouldn't want any false information. Mr.... excuse me Dr. Jordan will keep everything on the up and up.<br /><br />Ultimately, Mr. Jordan was qualified to be the Trade Minister of the DRCongo. His credentials were as real as Ilunga was a real person.<br /><br />Truth of the matter is that Essjay didn't have the qualifications he said he did. He is a 24 year old male from the United States and (there is much confusion about this) possibly works as a paralegal after dropping from community college.<br /><br />In a questionable attempt to defend himself, Dr. J... oops Mr. Jordan points to others to move scorn away from himself. He accuses Stacy Schiff of having offered to pay him for his interview - the journalistic equivalent of "coming-out of the closet" at a "Hate Convention." I'm thinking it wouldn't happen.<br /><br />Mr. Jordan continues by alleging to take the high road and decline any such improper offer. Instead he purports to direct Schiff to give the money to the Wiki Foundations.<br /><br />Wow.<br /><br />We now know Mr. Jordan is full of crap. Good for him though. He refused to take money for information. The implied ideal is the free exchange of information is a noble and greater cause. By suggesting he refused the enumeration and conducted the interview without regard for himself, he was grasping at martyrdom and subsequently provides that payment for information is a flawed and corrupt practice contrary to the ethos of Wiki.<br /><br /><em>Payment for information is a flawed and corrupt practice contrary to the ethos of Wiki. </em><br /><br />That'd make Wiki-founder Jimbo Wales quite proud. Wales is a great proponent of the free sharing of information. (I'm not being cynical or sarcastic.) (Yet.) I applaud that idea. The free sharing and availability of information is paramount to human rights causes.<br /><br />From the Wikipedia article on <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jimmy_Wales">Wales:</a><br /><blockquote><br />Wales has explained his motivations about Wikipedia. In an interview with <a title="Slashdot" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slashdot">Slashdot</a>, he said, "Imagine a world in which every single person on the planet is given free access to the sum of all human knowledge. That's what we're doing." </blockquote>The Wikipedia article on Wales reports he is a fan of Ayn Rand. In my opinion, Anthem by Ayn Rand is a beautiful work which keenly addresses the inhibition of informational freedom by an oppressive regime.<br /><br />Let us contrast this with practice as found on the discussion page for the article:<br /><br /><blockquote><p>[Name removed] has pledged a bounty of $15 in donation to the <a title="Wikimedia Foundation" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikimedia_Foundation">Wikimedia Foundation</a> contingent on Jimmy Wales's <a title="Wikipedia:What is a featured article" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:What_is_a_featured_article">improvement</a> to <a title="Wikipedia:Featured articles" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Featured_articles">featured status</a>.</p></blockquote>Wait... Doesn't this mean "If you change the information, I'll give you money."?<br /><br />And doesn't a Wikia Search Engine for profit also question the purity of the information provided? Regardless of the pure motives of people paying for the service and <em>even the validity </em>of the information provided, there is a dilemma created which seems to position itself contrary to what Wikipedia would like to be.<br /><br />Is Wikipedia bad? No! Certainly not. If you use Wikipedia as your single source for reference, your research is likely to be flawed. If you use <strong><em>ANY</em></strong> source exclusively without fact checking and validating references you will have the same problem.<br /><br />By the way, please visit the <a href="http://www.andrewlih.com/blog/">blog of Andrew Lih </a>which unknowingly (and likely involuntarily) helped with this post.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-30082784647381606842007-03-08T14:55:00.000-08:002007-03-08T15:27:16.060-08:00I'd be rich.I'd be rich if I had a clue how to handle money.<br /><br />Seriously. I am terrible with money. I tend to be impulsive and in addition I'm not very good at following through on things.<br /><br />I don't want to confirm this, because I'm fairly certain and wouldn't want to poor salt into the wound, but I probably pay more each month in overdraft fees then the nominal annual Gross Domestic Product per capita of 32 countries. (Yes damn it. I looked.)<br /><br />Budget you say? Sounds like a good idea. In fact, I love ideas. I have tons of them. Good ones at that. I'm not the only one who thinks so. Reasonable people who don't read this blog (that may be redundant) think so.<br /><br />My employment is lucrative. I make 2x the per capita GDP. I don't buy toys like new cars or boats. In fact, I live very comfortably far removed from poverty. So, when I say I'd be rich I must be referring to disposable income. Then again, since I have no idea how to handle money, that may not be the right term.<br /><br />So where does it go? I have no idea. (See previous post about that.)<br /><br />Subsequently, I have resolved the following steps must be taken to rectify my (lack of) plight.<br /><br />1.) I'm selling a kidney. I haven't decided which one. They've both been good to me. There may be some separation anxiety on their part, so please be patient with any behavioral outbursts they may exhibit.<br /><br />2.) I'm going Pro on the game show circuit. I am a wealth of useless knowledge. I have as much gravitas as Wikipedia. I have a secret weapon too. I will taunt and intimidate my way to Jeopardy Superdom until Alex worships at my feet.<br /><br />3.) Sell my secret formula for clean, renewable, resource-free, energy.<br /><br />4.) OK. I got nothing. Besides I have to take this phone call from the bank.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-43388368652531078812007-03-07T11:50:00.000-08:002007-03-07T15:10:02.112-08:00It's not what you knowNot knowing the Trade Minister you appointed is not a real person.<br /><em>Not good.<br /></em>Not knowing you've committed an act of war by getting lost.<br /><em>Not good. </em><br />Not knowing the origins of lipstick on your collar noticed by spouse.<br /><em>Not good.<br /></em>Not knowing how fast you were going when the Traffic Nazi asks.<br /><em>Not good. </em><br />Not knowing how much is in the account when you cut that check.<br /><em>Not good.<br /></em><br />Knowing that you don't know what you said you know and using it to influence how other people know or don't know things, then having a reporter know that you don't know, who in turn let's everyone know you don't know.<br /><br /><em>Well, that's just </em><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Essjay_controversy"><em>Wiki-scandalous.</em></a><em><br /></em><br />It's not what you know, it's what you don't know. I suppose those are the same thing. Then again, maybe they're not.<br /><br />Let's say you sponsor the re-authorization of the Patriot Act. You just might want to know what's in there.<br /><br />Or, you are the Congressional Research Service / Library of Congress writing the <a href="http://fpc.state.gov/documents/organization/51133.pdf">"USA PATRIOT Act Reauthorization in Brief"</a> you should know what's in there.<br /><br />Or better yet, when you're any of those people and you're confronted with something you didn't know was in there, you should be able to know how it got there.<br /><br />For the moment, put aside the common arguments about the Patriot Act and Civil Liberties. Instead let us address the Reauthorization changed the process for appointment of interim US Attorneys. You knew that right?<br /><br />Briefly: Previous to the Reauthorization, should a US Attorney have left the position, the replacement would go through a Confirmation process in the Senate. If this did not occur within a certain period, the Judges for the respective District were empowered to appoint one.<br /><br />Back to the present, however, the Reauthorization changed this. Now, the appointments are for the duration of the Presidents term and there is no confirmation requirement.<br /><br />No confirmation means the Senate <em>doesn't know</em> anything about these appointees. That could be bad. What's worse is the Senate (and the House for that matter) <em>don't know</em> how this happened. Should they know? Yes, they're the ones who did it. Now, t<em>hat's realllly bad.</em><br /><br />The Constitutional issues surrounding the new and improved appointment process are a worthwhile discussion of their own. Sub-topics of Congressional Oversight, the Separation of Power, and impropriety with influence are all worthy. I'll leave that up to someone else.<br /><br />Instead, I'll just make fun of Congress. It's great to watch the Elected as they bitch and moan about how bad this change is for the known universe. Especially in light of the fact that it was their idea. They just <em>didn't know</em> it was their idea. Unless of course, it wasn't their idea, and they just <em>don't know</em> what the hell they're doing most of the time. The latter being my choice.<br /><br />"Ignorantia juris non excusat"<br /><br />Ignorance of a law is not a valid defense when a reasonable person in the same circumstance would know such an act or omission would constitute a violation of law. The governed populace is held accountable to the enacted statutory law. Offering a defense of <em>"I didn't know</em>" isn't valid.<br /><br />Applying such a legal theory to the Legislators-with-their-panties-in-a-bunch; they have no defense to <em>not knowing</em>. Unless of course, (I may be on to something here) they aren't covered by the "reasonable person" standard. Yes that must be it. Clearly the best tactic Congress can apply to their defense at this point is to admit they're idiots. "We the Congress today enter an Alford Plea of guilty to the charge of being nincompoops."<br /><br />"It isn't possible for a member of Congress to read every word of every bill."<br /><br />I'll give you that. It's true. Given the current speed of deforestation by legislative activity, it certainly would not be possible to read each of those oh-so-enjoyable works of governing wonder.<br /><br />There is something then, that can be fixed.<br /><br />1. Current legislation is written so technically and verbose that it makes impossible to understand on it's face. Certainly, much of this is done to eliminate loopholes, but it also creates them and further renders the whole affair intangible. Legislation after enactment must commonly be interpreted by an intermediate who offers the opinion as de facto law.<br /><br />2. There is no real enforcement of bill spirit vs. content in legislative administration. It's not an easy task on it's honorable side as there is so much to administer. On the less than honorable side wherein appropriations for angry, purple, lesbian, chinchilla breeding are tagged on as part of the NASA budget, it's not even attempted. However, if you don't want to be hoodwinked again and you want to restore some credibility to the institution, enforce content focus.<br /><br />3. Lastly, don't write so much. Yes, you were sent there to represent the interests of your constituents. You went there with projects. You have pressing issues which need to be addressed. The issues addressed in the <a href="http://frwebgate.access.gpo.gov/cgi-bin/getdoc.cgi?dbname=109_cong_public_laws&docid=f:publ481.109">"Geneva Distinctive Emblems Protection Act of 2006"</a> were keeping everyone up in terror until you resolved it. It may have prevented an Austrian invasion-by-accident of Liechtenstein. For that, we are all grateful.<br /><br />4. If you sponsor a bill, you damn well better read the whole thing. Better yet, you should have to recite it from memory. AND if someone asks you (Sen Specter - sponsor) how this appeared in the final compromise version, you should have a better answer than " <em>I don't know"</em><br /><br /><br /><ul><li>(Sec. 502) Modifies provisions regarding U.S. attorney vacancies to provide that a person appointed shall serve until the qualification of a U.S. attorney for the district (currently, until the earlier of that time or the expiration of 120 days after appointment by the Attorney General). </li></ul><br />5. If you don't have time to read it, don't vote on it. It must not be that important. If you had read it, you would have avoided the embarrassment of complaining about the result as Senator Feinstein has done with the Appointment Issue within the Reauthorization.<br /><br />She voted for it. Did I mention she co-sponsored the Senate Bill for it? It's okay though, she <em>didn't know.</em>JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-26949957363549454202007-03-06T20:00:00.000-08:002007-03-06T20:15:05.068-08:00environs politikI'd like to think I may have coined a phrase. However, there are problems abound with such a thought. <br /><br />The first is it is presumptious. Not only because there is a likelyhood I am not the first to say it - given the likehood of impending dateline for the reaching of critical mass of infinite-monkey-time-and-typewriter scenarios. By the way, I like much of the monkey's work. <br /><br />But also presumptious because coining a phrase implies someone else gives a shit, uses it, and adds veracity by their use. Coining a phrase depends not as much on the person saying it, but of others accepting it and putting it to their own use. It's anathema to copyright and fact-checking. <br /><br />"The phrase has no value unless I agree with it." <br /><br />Which oddly enough, is very similar to the phrase of instant. "<strong><em>Environs politik</strong></em>" My thought process (which any reader of this blog should surely question) leads me through a review of belief systems, point of view, subjectiveness, and absolute truth and how each of these affect one's opinion on any given matter. <br /><br />It is not the same as situational ethics or moral relativism. I interpret the works of Fletcher and Doris to impune the their title holder as 1) doing something wrong or immoral and 2) the holder values subject to change. Addressing the 2nd point, if the value changes it either 1) denies an absolute truth or 2) veres from that truth and makes the value wrong or immoral.<br /><br />Not to push the Abortion Flame Post Button, but consider this:<br /><br />There is much heated dislike, name calling, and flat hatred in the debate of Reproductive Rights v. Right to Life. Both edges of the proponents commonly label eachother as lacking in knowledge. Commonly as unbelievers from a faith standpoint or as uneducated and in denial from a scientific standpoint.<br /><br />Back to monkeys though. And their requisite issued wrench. The two sides in the Abortion debate will incestently hurl insults unless they can be convinced of one thing. When does the (insert term here) become a human life? <br /><br />When I wrote (insert term here) your <em>environs politik</em> may have betrayed your belief and provided the term. Either embyro, child, baby, fetus etc. <br /><br />Can you really say I'm a bad person if I believe life starts at conception? If I do believe that, then how can you disparrage me for trying to protect a human life? Inversely, if I believe life begins at XX weeks or whenever, can someone be blamed for the distrust of Pro-Life people wishing to interfere with a woman's medical choices. <br /><br />I am certainly not trying to hash out the abortion debate. Rather, I am making a point about how one's personal experience, upbringing, and other influences define their decision making process.<br /><br />There are certainly societal norms. Perhaps varying between societal groups. Again, a function of the <em>environs politik</em>.<br /><br />My next example. I originally posted this on 09/17/2006 as a Live QnA response to the question: What is a terrorist?<br /><em><br />The word terror originates from Old French, Middle English, and Latin meaning "to Frighten" and implies an intense fear. Today's popular use of the word is somewhat subjective and the use is rarely self applied, rather it is applied by someone other than the person being so labled.<br /><br />In my opinion, a terrorist is someone who is:<br />1) A member of a group not widely recognized as a nation.<br />2) Uses violence, fear, intimidation, or similar actions.<br />3) Intentionally, without regard or remorse targets both Military and Civilian<br />4) Those acts are considered criminal by the Government in place where the act occured<br />5) And the acts are conducted to pursue some idealistic political, social, or religious goal.<br /><br />I think the term is a label which is truly subjective. Please don't take this to mean I support such behavior, as I find such acts to be disgusting. Rather, I mean the term is commonly applied by the victors or those in power. In the histories of many nations there are those people who are heralded as "freedom fighters" or "heros" when the person applying the term believes in what the "terrorist" has done.<br /><br />The same "perception based value" can be seen in civil wars. If a group successfully breaks away, it's a war of Independence. If the nation is held together, it's a Civil war.<br /><br />My last opinion is this: The intentional targetting of civilian peoples to pursue a political goal by a group who can not bring about change through internationally accepted means is diabolical.</em><br /><br />I used the term "perception based value" in that response. I didn't feel it adequately represented what I meant. I believe "environs politik" does. Bizzare, however it may be since I brought it up, I don't think it applies to terrorism as I define it.<br /><br />As I see it, <em>envrions politik</em> applies no fault. It only works for me when the resultant action does not strike me as "immoral". Then again, immoral implies an absolute truth which will vary on one's <em>environ politik</em>.<br /><br />If I consume beef in the US it is one thing, in India quite another. The acceptance of felines, dogs, pork, cheese on a hamburger, and onward elicit varied responses. Those responses and tangential legalism are likely results of the <em>environ politik</em>.<br /><br />I think it's a useful phrase. Your assistance in veracity addition is welcomed. Less it should suffer the fate of hapax legomenon.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-2107417580341280282007-03-05T01:54:00.000-08:002007-03-06T18:01:24.175-08:00hapax legomenonWhere is Burke when you need him? Which Burke? James Burke of course.<br /><br />Here is a man who puts Johnny <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Cochran's</span> logical progressions to shame. If Burke said angry, purple, lesbian, chinchillas were the origin of the Space Shuttle program, then you had best believe him. In fact, I believe he did say that's how it happened.<br /><br />If Burke said the Internet didn't exist and I read that on his website, then it would be that much more factual.<br /><br />So what is it I need Mr. Burke to do? I need Burke to keep track of what the hell I was doing a few minutes ago. Burke is likely the only one who could research my dysfunctional thought process that started with a topic for today's blog entry and ended up with the phrase: "<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">hapax</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">legomenon</span>".<br /><br />So in a Connections-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">esque</span> blog entry for the day we start with the Democratic Republic of Congo. A nice enough place, but in fact home to the deadliest conflict since World War II. While one may <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">surprised</span> to learn this, especially with it's neighbors of Sudan and Rwanda and their mastery of genocide, Congo has been passed around by Dictators, Superpowers, and Colonialists - leading it to it's present station.<br /><br />In a short modern history, Congo was a Belgian Colony until 1960. They repackaged themselves in 1971 as Zaire. They went through much turmoil and turnover until a series of wars beginning in 1996 until July of 2006 (now referring to themselves as Congo Classic) when they held their first free elections since Belgian <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Independence</span>.<br /><br />Every good new administration needs a cabinet. You need a minister for this that and the other thing. The other thing just happened to be Trade.<br /><br />Enter Andre <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Kasongo</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Ilunga</span>. This guy is the bomb. He's 34 and excellently qualified. Nothing hidden in his background. No previous positions on issues to raise a stink. No illegitimate children. No major financial interest in Enron, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Haliburton</span>, or Disney. He's never smoked a cigar so we don't have to worry about Monica.<br /><br />In fact, he is the perfect man for the job. He will never do anything along the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Gaff</span>-line, because.. well because he doesn't exist. That could be a problem for some. I think he's perfect though. He won't ever lie to anyone about what happened.<br /><br />You see, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Ilunga</span> was the creation of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Honorius</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">Kisimba</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">Ngoyof</span>. He wanted the job. But the rules required the party provide two candidates. So <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">Kisimba</span> creates <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">Ilunga</span> as the second option. <em>Surely they wouldn't pick <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">Ilunga</span> over him.<br /></em><br />You can make the argument that this is "gaming the game". Within a framework of rules and norms there may be undefined conduct. This conduct is neither legal and allowed or illegal and disallowed. In fact gaming the game, generally is a means to end where the action adheres to the rules but was an abortion of a mechanism intended to inhibit some other action.<br /><br />Next, gaming the game lead me to <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17">Google</span> Bombing. The practice of doctoring a web page so it ranks higher in search results. Its quite a sport. Imagine searching for Chevrolet where the top 25 results were Ford pages.<br /><br />Not far removed from the Google Bomb is <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18">Googlewhack</span> or <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">Googlewhacking</span>. You enter a query into the search engine of 2 words. Both words must be in the search engines <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20">repertoire</span>. A successful <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21">Googlewhack</span> returns only one result. ( <a href="http://www.googlewhack.com/rules.htm">http://www.googlewhack.com/rules.htm</a> )<br /><br />This brings us to the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">hapax</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">legomenon</span>. A <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_24">googlewhack</span> is the miserable progression of such a thing.<br /><br />From <a class="extiw" title="w:Ancient_Greek" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ancient_Greek">Ancient Greek</a> ‘(something) said only once’. Noun. A word occurring only once in a given corpus. There is a lovely technical term for a word that appears once in a body of text: a <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_25">hapax</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_26">legomenon</span> (plural: <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_27">hapax</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_28">legomena</span>), Greek for “once said.” The term comes from philology, the study of old texts. — Steven Pinker, Words and Rules page 172.<br /><br />It's Shakespeare's fault. Ask <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_29">Costard</span> about <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_30">Honorificabilitudinitatibus</span>. Better yet, ask Burke. It's something to do with the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_31">aforementioned</span> chinchillas.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-39096147755341601822007-03-04T02:52:00.000-08:002007-03-04T03:38:22.023-08:00Some scenariosScenario 1.<br /><br />You walk into the local diner with some friends. You invited more but only a few came. You told your friends you had a coupon for a free meal for all. The food is okay. The service is somewhat lacking. You start looking through your wallet for that coupon.<br /><br />The problem is you don't have that coupon. You knew that going in there. In fact, you're not sure you ever had it. Other patrons are staring and pointing fingers. Perhaps you thought your friend who is a waitress might help you out.<br /><br />Slowly, your friends start to realise you don't have that coupon or any money whatsoever. Those friends begin to slip out the door. Now you're wondering if you should do the same.<br /><br />Scenario 2.<br /><br />You're a younger, suave, male with great aspirations and noble ideals. You befriend a stunning young lady who trusts you without question. You mistake infatuation for love. She lives in an abusive home and was looking for security. You tell her you will always be there for her and this is the ultimate act to express that love.<br /><br />As in all "After-School-Specials" you fail to wear the appropriate protective gear. That stunning young lady is now carrying a child. Her parents reject her along with her friends and peers. She wants to keep the baby and she wants your help.<br /><br />You expected a quick, enjoyable, relationship. Now everyone is telling you to run.<br /><br />Scenario 3<br /><br />You're a surgeon who has begun a heart transplant. Admittedly, the heart had problems. It was causing the lungs to work more than they should. Instead, you (the surgeon) tell the patient the heart has to be replaced because the brain-heart widget is broken. Being wondrous studies of anatomy and physiology, we know there is no brain-heart widget. However, the patient is on the table, you have removed the heart, and Oh? Did I mention we don't have a donor?<br /><br />The point.<br /><br />In each situation you have done something you perhaps should not have done. You are responsible for the situation, if not fully, at least in part. You made the mess. You clean it up.<br /><br />Just because you may have created the mess under less than honorable motives, it does not absolve you of your responsibilities.<br /><br />That said, make WMD the coupon. Iraq the diner. Iraq the poor girl and stability and sovereignty the child. Or, lastly, Iraq is the patient.<br /><br />Many activists are calling for the withdrawal of US forces from Iraq because the pretense for the invasion is lacking in veracity at a minimum.<br /><br />Well too bad. You've eaten the meal, the young lady is expecting, and you better find a suitable heart.<br /><br />The withdrawal of forces from Iraq will not rectify any injustice incurred. Certainly, it will only amplify the problem. It is naive to think such a withdrawal will improve the situation. In a politically unstable region such as the middle east where human rights violations abound, such a withdrawal would lead to greater chaos. Chaos which undoubtedly would lead to a larger theater war destined to re-draw the US military into a larger and likely more distasteful engagement.<br /><br />Perhaps the conflict is about oil. Fair enough. Get off your high horse... Scratch that. Get on your high horse and stop driving yourself to work. Stop running your PC 24/7 and using up power generated from fossil fuels. It is easy to take the road of nobility when you don't have to be accountable for your personal actions.<br /><br />Anyone who purports to believe a complete and unilateral withdrawal from Iraq would improve the situation needs to lay off the psychoactives. The world is a shitty place. Yes, hindsight clearly shows there are better routes. Guess what though? You can't go back. It's done.<br /><br />It is incredibly irresponsible and immoral not to clean up this mess.JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1727039039730837349.post-19165443462924014592007-03-04T02:32:00.000-08:002007-03-04T04:31:11.242-08:00The phone call...Clearly no one cares about the sovereignty of Liechtenstein.<br /><br />The problem is, the Swiss don't even have the common decency to at least generate some sort of hoopla about yellow cake and WMD. Actually, I think the current administration should take note on how to handle this sort of thing. There's a lesson to be learned.<br /><br /><br />That lesson is: if you have a really good reason to invade somewhere, but don't want to share it, just tell the invaded "My bad."<br /><br />For those of you who didn't already know, Switzerland invaded Liechtenstein during the early hours of March 2nd 2007. It's not a big deal and you can rest assured, they didn't mean it. One might say it is "Friendly Fire Imperialism".<br /><br />A spokesman for the Swiss Army, Daniel Reist, told the Associated Press "We've spoken to the authorities in Liechtenstein and it's not a problem."<br /><br />Liechtenstein Interior Ministry spokesman Markus Amman was quoted as saying no one in Liechtenstein had noticed the invasion. He told AP "It's not like they stormed over here with attack helicopters or something."<br /><br />This brings up a number of issues. In Liechtenstein, a country with a population of about 34,000 do you really need an "Interior Ministry Spokesman"? I'm guessing they could save some money and just have the Interior Minister do it themselves.<br /><br />The second issue is it's apparently not actually an official act of war unless you "[storm] with attack helicopters or something."<br /><br />It's quite the precedent.<br /><br />Austria (Liechtenstein's other border) take note. If I'm the head of random invasion planning for the Austrian Military, I'm going to go ahead and march a battalion of attack-helicopter-less ninjas into downtown Liechtenstein and yell "Oli-Oli-Ox-In-Free! You're mine now bitch!"<br /><br />Lastly, how exactly does that phone call play out?<br /><br />Amman: Liechtenstein Interior Ministry. We don't have an army. Markus Amman speaking. How may I direct your call?<br /><br />Reist: Yeah. Ummm. Markus..... This is Daniel Reist over at the Swiss Army...<br /><br />Amman: (Interrupting) Hey, I thought you guys were neutral. You have an Army?<br /><br />Reist: Uh... yeah. Well, that's the thing. We uh... well, we kinda invaded you. But it was an accident.<br /><br />*Silence*<br /><br />Amman: Sir, this is Liechtenstein's Interior Ministry. Did you mean to call France instead? Yes. That must be it. I think you have the wrong number. If you've invaded someone and need to tell them, I expect you want France instead. Let me find that numb......<br /><br />Reist: No. No, I have the right number. You see some of our Army...<br /><br />Amman: You have an Ar...<br /><br /><br />Reist: Yes Damn it. Now listen. Like I said, we didn't mean it.<br /><br />Amman: Uh. OK. Well... We hadn't noticed. Will you be staying long? What are your demands? Please, do understand we're a little short on insurgents right now, if that's what you were hoping to find.<br /><br /><br />Reist: Actually, we already left.<br /><br />Amman: I see. I was wondering why I hadn't seen that memo.<br /><br /><br />Reist: Yeah.... OK, just thought we should let you know. If you need a watch or a knife or something..<br /><br />Amman: Great. Well I appreciate it. You sure you don't want the French number while I have you on the line?<br /><br />As you can clearly see the route to avoid international condemnation is to say "Ooops."JD Hetzerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17325808944632310581noreply@blogger.com0